Monday, September 26, 2011

Forget Me Not's

Seems like every day now I get to experience something new with my daughter, something that thrills me, takes my breath way, amazes me, frustrates me to no end, and always reminds me that there is nothing more important in the world than what is right in front of me. Prior to Amari's arrival, I was almost always plagued by thoughts and feelings and feelings that I was supposed to be doing something else - something bigger, better, more useful. I never did anything about it - just used it as an excuse to put down the book I was reading, quit the job I had, or break up with the girlfriend I was wasting my time with.

Today I live in the blissful state that is now, no longer incarcerated by doubt or worry, somehow soothed even in the most challenging of moments by the certainty that there is nowhere else I need to be right now. I recently watched a documentary on Buddhism in which the narrator described the tenet that life in life we suffer because people and things die or leave us. He went on to say that if we could just realize that everything we love and are attached to is already gone, then we could better appreciate each moment we have together.

It reminds me not to take this precious and brief time with Amari for granted. Here are a few notes I took on her development over the course of the past two weeks.

* Out of the blue Amari changed her standard "No" response to a more surprising and definitely cuter, "No way." I'm pretty sure she got that one from Mama.

* Earlier this week, Amari composed her first song on the piano. I didn't manage to catch it on film, but it went a little something like this, "This, this, this...(pause). Up Mama, up Dada. This, this, this...up Mama, up Dada." Also, whenever I decide to play guitar and strum a few chords, she runs across the house screaming, "Piano...Amari, piano. Piano," then climbs up on the stool and starts hammering on the key.

* Amari is still not a big fan of the diaper change. She is, however, a big fan of putting diapers on anything she has access to. Generally, she will spend twenty minutes or so repositioning Kermit, Dragon, or Sid the Science Kid, then try to wrap them snugly in the diaper. I've also caught her trying to put a diaper on an Indian statue, our cat Penny, and most recently a fork. Not sure where those last two came from.

I'm sure there are more already and will certianly be at least one tomorrow, but for now...g'night all.

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